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Plus, unlike other free Indian dating sites in the UK, e Harmony won’t make you spend hours scrolling through profiles, searching for someone special.

Instead, we’ll send you a carefully selected batch of matches every day, specially tailored to you, saving you time and helping you to preserve your privacy.

You will be expected to learn Punjabi/ Hindi/ Gujarati within a week, ok? Buy bigger trousers and prepare to pile on the gulab jamun pounds.

At e Harmony, we know that finding UK singles who share your heritage, religion and values can be a daunting prospect, which is why we take the time to really get to know you and what you’re looking for in a partner.

), but it’s being saved in the present cupboard to give to someone else in two years time. Get comfortable, ‘cause minimum running time is three hours.

If we don’t like a gift you’ve given us, we’ll happily accept it (free, remember? Think it would be nice to settle down for a romantic Bollywood film? Neither does Bend It Like Beckham, although our Dadi knows Gurinder Chada, and Sanjeev Bhaskar.

Same goes for all the uncle-jis in our life – they’re just a random older relative.

Wait, what do you mean they’re not really your aunty?! Yes, we all have at least one relative called Pinky, and what? They all can speak fluent English, punctuated with Indian swear words...